A Time For Everything

 Wow!  I can't believe it's been a year since I started this blog, nor that it's been a year since I've written one single thing other than on the day I created it.  I guess I shouldn't be surprised, as I always set out to write something, and then fall short.  Sometimes I wish that writing wasn't so incredibly personal to me and that I could just whip out works as others seem to do.  Then I realize that that is not who I am, nor who I was created to be, so I'm happy for the 'whippers' and continue to be me and bare my soul in print.

I am still wild about tatting, but a lot of things have happened to me personally over this last year that have given me pause.  Not about the art itself, but my part in it.  My relationships with others.  My passions.  Some not nice things have happened to me, and while I will not divulge any details on any public platform, those things have served to open my eyes to things I wasn't even noticing before.  Not about tatting, really.  Not even about others opinions of, or actions toward me, though that did play a role.  Actually, I've been learning a lot about myself!

Imagine that! 44 years old (though very very close to 45), and still learning things about myself... I mean after 44 years, you'd think I'd know everything there was to know about myself, but no!  How strange.  I'm learning that I need to pay attention to what I'm paying attention to.  Sometimes I get in a routine.  I enjoy routines and planning.  Sometimes, though I need to examine that routine and question my motives.  Am I doing this routine because it's where God has placed me?  Am I doing this routine because it's easy?  Am I doing this because I don't want to do something different?  See what I mean?  Over the last year, I never questioned myself.  I never checked in with myself.

Now, my routine has changed abruptly, and I'm left adrift in my own musings.  What a wonderful place to be!  Now I can wait on the timing of God and not rush into something just because I want to do it!  Now, I can check in with myself and find out if my pursuits are actually bringing me the joy and peace and fulfillment that God means for me to have.

I don't know what's next for me.  As a meme I saw recently said, "I trust the next chapter, because I know the Author."  So, that's what I'm going to do... trust the author.  Hold onto that which I know He's placed in me a desire to do.  Hold onto my dreams and see how He's going to fulfill them.  Maybe I'll be more involved in the "tatting world," maybe not.  Maybe I'll teach some tatting, maybe not.  

Maybe I'll write more than 1 or 2 blog entries a year... maybe.